Monday, November 19, 2007


God is a mystery. Have you ever really thought about how much we don't know about him? It kinda makes my brain hurt. :) Everytime we have an infant baptism at church, Burt (our pastor) talks about how before God put the sun in space and hung the stars in the sky, He knew me!!!!! How awesome is that?! He thought me up and named me. He knew that I would one day be sitting on my deck, blogging about this. WOW! The Creator knows who I am. Doesn't that blow your mind?

Another mystery to me is how pain and sorrow is for our good. I have a dear friend who, a couple of weeks ago, lost her father and had her first child. I have another sister of the heart who recently had a miscarriage. Crissy and I are missing our Mama. Our grandparents have Alzheimer's. God has been teaching me that He has a plan. It's not important that I don't know, understand, or approve of it. He is in control.

After years of separation and pain, I have been reunited with my first Sister Chick friend, Tricia. Why did we have to be apart? My curiosity almost overwhelms me. What does God have in store for us? I'm almost afraid to be excited over this. What if He takes her away again? Then I feel my Abba Father's arms around me. I can hear Him whisper in my heart, "Trust me. I love you." Just that easily, He soothes my hurt and fear. God, I believe. Help my unbelief.


Crissy said...


Anonymous said...

It's so hard to realize that God is in control. It messes up your ego big time. I see people around me, people I love dearly hurting and suffering and I wonder why, I ask it outloud sometimes. It's a lesson on trusting the Father. I try very hard to think about how big God is and I just can't, like you said it's too much for my simple mind to grasp. I'm so sorry you and Crissy are missing your mamma. I can only imagine the pain you feel, but know I'll be lifting you girls up in prayer.

Tricia Speaks said...

I have wrestled so much with my unbelief lately. There seems to be such randomness to this life that we forget that God knew, knows and will always know what is in our heart. He knows the count of our hairs on our head and for some we know, the loss of those same hairs(ahem...maybe speaking of Dallas & Scott). I have questioned my faith and where it is truly that God is leading us. I do however have faith that he will lead me where I should be. I don't need to know where it is, just to follow. I am so sorry that you are hurting and just imagine a big hug from me and I hope the mental image at least will make you smile.